Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
