actually, I'm a sock model
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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