When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
