I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
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