Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
