Jerry, you need to find god
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
