I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Randomize
