Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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