dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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