for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
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