How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
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