is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
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