well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize
