Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Randomize
