there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Randomize
