We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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