So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I need to sanitize my soul.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
that is very illegal...i love you.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
