At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
