i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
