You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
