Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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