Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
