Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Randomize
