i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Randomize
