Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I have post one night stand depression
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