Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
