come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
