So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
