He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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