i'm lost and i look like a hooker
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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