i just wanna soil my oats bro
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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