id be glad to
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
