if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Randomize