I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
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