I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
