:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
