A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
