Where are you?
In a non slutty way
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
he told me I talked like a deaf person
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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