OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
