she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
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