Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
