we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize