i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
