So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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