I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
Randomize
