Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
two words...techno handjob
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
