So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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