Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I fill condoms, not promises.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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