I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Randomize
