spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
